Skip to main content

Married Couples, Solo Sleeping

Is it a taboo, or a topic you don’t want to solo-sleep about, or did I stir up your feelings, inside out, upside down? Aha! Nope, neither we should sleep about it.  I admit, I am a solo sleeper, not slipper! Hahaha! Why, are like beating your chest now, or you are already in the same solo-sleepers gang of mine? Honestly, no one have to the right to Brew-Ha-Ha if we are married solo sleepers and don’t even waste your time explaining why. Having said that, I can’t help but wonder if solo sleeping is only amongst the older generation, who have been married for donkey years, or even younger couples, married for the years you can easily count with your toes?

In my case, solo sleeping was my choice. He in fact, was dead against, until the roof almost came crashing on my head. Apart from, he wouldn’t even get a new bed to replace the one almost shaking and dropping on the floor, in the room, across the master bedroom where I used to fake my sleep for the sake of marriage faking. Aside to whether our marriage is lovey-dovey or not, my marriage however has shown a clearer picture why I should solo sleep. Furthermore, it wasn’t a brain cracking choice, because for the longest time I have been a solo-traveler, obviously, I solo-sleep, unless of course, thrown in frills and trills. Hehehe! Guess what as well? I thought I am one of the rare married species who solo-sleep, but no, no, no. The wild cat is definitely out of the bag. Why do people like me, married, yet, we prefer to solo sleep?


Goodness Gracious! People can snore, they can. Normal snoring like the musical box music is tolerable, but those like hurricane, tornedo or Beethoven’s loud blasting? KO! As if you are sleeping in hammer house of horror. Mind you, people who snore hate it when you tell them, moreover, they feel we are picking on them. Not realizing, when sleep takes over them, they are automatically transformed as the “raw -raw roaring” creatures.

The shaker and mover in the bedroom. Something about men, correct me if I am wrong, they want to feel as if they are sleeping in Alaska? Even when rain is ripping the world apart, don’t you dare switch off the air-cond. In fact, the air-cond can be their best companion compared to the spouse. Air-cond, believe it or not, can actually be the game changer in marriage sleeping. Either you withstand or logic out, or you shiver to death until you wake up.    

Pillow, Blanket & Bed Love War

When the indirect love war of air-cond sparks, or is flaming high, pillow and blanket are the victims. They are ripped and pulled apart, until it depends, who give in or who give up. What about bed space? Survival of the toughest, akin let the marriage battle begin. Some people, mind you, they can sleep by spreading their hands and legs widest. Or, perhaps, the hidden agenda is, time for marriage night time revenge?  


Me-time is not about just being independent in not leaning on your spouse. It is also, mind you, about me-time bedtime for self-love, for from a distance marriage love, and for marriage recuperating. Me-time sleeping by the way don’t have to be permanent. It can be every now and then, as a breather, by giving the space for your spouse when they need it.    

Watching TV

Watching tv in the bedroom? I say nothing, I say none, it’s really up to you. Then again, imagine married to someone who loves to blast the tv, and even laughs loudest to the silliest jokes whilst at tv programs, or literally forcing you to watch together?   

Handphone Staring

Tell me about it. What else is new these days? As much as we know handphone staring is running down our health, also, gunning down marriages? Yet, being hooked on the handphone, I believe is not a pleasing bedroom entertainment for your spouse?   


Drifted Apart

Couples staying together for reasons only best known to them, even when marriage is already a rocker and shaker. Seriously, in such instances, you think sleeping together will do any justice, or will be like, sleeping with your enemy? Perhaps, solo-sleeping should be the option?   


No Sex

I reckon no sex is no excuse to solo-sleeping. But, if there’s no hugging, lovingness and being affectionate? Will sleeping together be justifiable? I don’t know, you have to decide for yourself. For some, it is perfectly “picture perfect marriage” fine to distance each other in the same bed, whereas, for others, I have a choice to my own bed.


Health Is Not Wealth

I know, it may seem cruelty to the highest degree to solo-sleep when health is not wealth for him or her. After all, it has been said - “In health and in sickness”.  Even so, what if spouse does not sleep the whole night, due to sickness restlessness, or constantly coughing, fidgety, so on and so forth? Will it be selfish to solo-sleep, or, for better or worse, I sleep by my spouse? Tough decision, right? Well, please remember, sleep is vital for all of us and if we don’t get our share of sleep, our health may end up in ruins. 

All said and done, it is not about sleeping together. It is actually what you do together or don’t do together in bed. Any other reasons I have missed out? For me, there’s something about growing older and preferring my own company in my own bed. Believe me, I just feel so good solo sleeping. I just love I the fact to getting into my room, hopping in bed, and feeling as though I am in the most wonderful sleeping paradise like a happy child. Even on the nights I can’t sleep, no problem. Roll from one end of the bed to the other, instead of like before, needling my man because I can’t sleep.     


Popular posts from this blog

Malaysian Sodhi (Indian Coconut Milk Stew)

Sodhi. Coconut milk infused and laced ( Shrimp Coconut Milk ) Indian coconut stew. In fact, sodhi is the branching of  Masak Lemak ( Vegetarian Malay Spinach Coconut Stew ), or vice-versa or whichever. Sodhi is definitely a popularity amongst the Indians and without a doubt, in my house as well. Sodhi is usually drenched over rice, and eaten alongside side dishes. Trust me, nothing like sodhi soaking or flooding up your rice and then, using your hands for mushy-mushy diving inside eating style. Sodhi. Like, every once a week in my house. In other words, a regularity and it is a dish that can be put up effortlessly. Needless to say, easy cooking and mind you, there are other variances of sodhi too, which I have already shared before ( Malu Kirata , Kiri Hodi , Prawn Sodhi & Cabbage Sodhi ). This latest sodhi? Basically, the humble, basic simplicity, but why a Malaysian Sodhi? Well, Cooked by this “The Crazy Lover” who is a typical, true and true Malaysian, and cooked in her, most o

Mochakottai Karuvadu Kulumbu (Field Beans Salted Fish Curry)

Look at this earthen pot and in it thick, salty, spicy and vibrantly exciting to our palates and eyes  Mochakottai Karuvadu Kulumbu (Field Beans Salted Fish Curry). Like immediately can trigger our hunger throne right? I know. I am definitely a big fan of this Indian style salted fish curry and salted fish on the whole by itself ( Spicy Ikan Bilis Potato , Sambal Tumis Ikan Bilis  &  Sambal Kentang Ikan Asin ), can drive me crazy because I so love saltiness. In fact, every day can be a salted fish meal day for me ( Salted Fish Pickle , Bean Sprouts Salted Fish  & Steamed Pork Salted Fish ). But, I think we all know it? Too much of saltiness and salt can ruin our health? Of course. Then again, there is such a thing as every now and then saltiness as our best friend? How do make this salted fish curry? Nothing much, no major confusing cooking matter ( Salted Fish Bone Curry ). My recipes as always will never cause you to struggle in the kitchen. Ingredients listed below

Restoran Orkid Thai - Section 9, Shah Alam

By the third day, Iphone 7 started showing its dark side. Really a terrifying-horrible shocking discovery, it kept rebooting every now and then for no apparent reason. Obviously, I couldn’t believe my eyes. Duh! Its a brand new phone I paid from  my savings ( Da De Bak Kut Teh Subang Jaya ), never ever have I encountered such a problem with my previous faithfully yours 6 year old Iphone 5. Absolutely heart wracking, I really couldn’t find the time ( Karaikudi Chicken Curry & Fikcles Cafe Taman Tun ) to rush to the service centre amidst the busyness of getting ready for the family wedding and another travel venture ( Oats Fried Prawn s ). Keeping my fingers crossed, hoping it’s just a minor teething problem, I went ahead with shopping nearby Plaza Shah Alam and Plaza Masalam. Accompanied by my niece, we bought a couple of things and then of course, naturally, shopping is more or less regarded as synonymous with hunger throne.